Do We Have Anything in Common Anymore?

Five Minute Friday, COMMON
// indicates when my 5 minutes ran out and I kept on writing anyway!

After a year and a half in Nepal, I am returning to America for a 3 month visit in 10 DAYS. Someone asked me the other day what was the first thing I wanted to do when I returned aside from visiting my family. My mind went totally blank. I said, “Go through a drive-thru?” just because that, even after only 18 months abroad, seems like a total novelty to me.

But I also very much look forward to coffee dates and lunch meet-ups with my mom and other friends. I imagine myself sitting across the table, chit-chatting the day away, and I realize… my imaginary conversation is happening in my second language! I try to re-imagine, and I can’t think of anything to say in my first.

I wonder if they will think I’m as weird as I feel like I’m going to be. Will we still be able to hold a conversation free from several awkward silences? Will their babies I’ve never met be scared of me? I wonder if they will think the stories I tell are interesting or just strange and unrelateable. Will we have anything in common anymore?

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My husband assures me that these fears will be unfounded (although there is no guarantee their babies won’t be afraid of the crazy person declaring herself their aunt). My friends that loved me before I left have still loved me with all the distance and silence between us. We might not pick right up where we left off, but maybe that’s why it’s called catching up.

We may not find common ground in our recent cultural experiences, but we will find it elsewhere. Maybe this table where we sit needs a perspective only my strangely unique experience could bring. Maybe more, this friendship needs me to not worry and just show up. To sit across the table with my biscuits and gravy (Bob Evans, y’all) and sigh. It sure is good to see an old friend.

The Hard Fought Battle for Contentment [The Mudroom]

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He stared at my back in the queen size bed we share. The inches between us loomed like a brick wall lined with barbed wire. I sobbed. He sighed. He must have felt as helpless as I did.

I suffered under a border blockade which prohibited the entry of petrol, propane, and essential goods in a country I never planned to live in. We faced winter with fewer than four hours of electricity to heat our home each day. It seemed I was at the mercy of an evolving government, the paper-thin houses, and my freezer-burned spirit. I was furious with my cozy Stateside friends who didn’t understand and my husband who couldn’t fix it.

In the morning, as I stood shivering, waiting for the shower to heat up, negative thoughts creeped in and claimed territory in my mind. I wished desperately for the rage to run right down the drain with the hot water. At the time, I wouldn’t have admitted that I was angry at God. I would have said I was overwhelmed and exhausted. I played the victim well because I believed I was absolutely powerless.

We had endured the hardships of an international move followed by natural disaster and economic crisis, but our marriage had now been threatened. Each night, we went to bed with cold hands and struggled to turn up the heat between life-long lovers wrapped up in ice cold sheets. Our intimacy had been killed by the chaos and cold that made up our days. The negative thoughts came around again to tell me what I already knew: I had lost all control.

Continue reading on The Mudroom…

 

linking up:

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#LMMLinkUp,  Monday Musings

 

Celebrate a Special Far-Away Friend with a “Birthday in a Box” [Women Behind the Scenes]

A birthday on the field can be a lonely time for an MK. She may remember her family and the fun celebrations they used to have back home. She may think about her favorite restaurant where she used to spend her birthdays or all the things she might receive if they were on American soil where they have all. the. things. Memories of birthdays past with special friends emerge with a longing to spend a day like those she’s spent before.

My daughter was young when we moved to the field, and the first birthday she had here was her fourth. Even at such a small age, she remembered her past birthday parties with her family. She wondered out loud if this birthday would be any fun. We included our friends here and had a small celebration a few days before, but when her actual birthday rolled around we didn’t have much planned…

Grandparents to the rescue!

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Continue reading this sweet story at Women Behind the Scenes and you’ll find a little tutorial to help you love someone special from far away, too!

Thank God for the Pit Stops

Five Minute Friday, JOURNEY

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“We traveled for two years and visited over 200 churches sharing about our missions endeavors. We spent A LOT of time on the road and racked up thousands of miles. Along the way, we made lots of pits stop. Generally, we just stopped for fast-food and potty breaks, but occasionally something else would demand a stop. We were too tired to keep our eyes open anymore. Our toddler ran out of juice. Flat tire. Nauseous pregnant lady. Saw friends getting off and exit and had a spontaneous double date at Waffle House.

These unplanned stops often weren’t welcome on our journey. They seemed to be an inconvenience when we just wanted to get from point A to point B. But they were necessary. We needed to stretch. We needed to rest, run around, stretch our legs, and nourish our bodies. We needed the pit stops.

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I think of the pit stops along the way of our journey to the mission field. The financial support that got a slow start. The family member that spent months ill before passing away. That car accident that rocked our world, took our baby, and canceled a whole month of meetings. The waiting and waiting and waiting for a visa that never came. These things were all unplanned and unwelcome.

But these times were all a part of the journey. They have made us the family that we are, serving in the country where we serve. During these times, we have been forced to seek the Lord and know His heart better. We have learned about ourselves and about each other.

We’ve learned to thank God for the pit stops.”

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Engaging the Enemy- the Only Thing I’ve Left to Say

DAY 31, ONLY

I’ve learned over the years to look into the context and not just the two plucked out verses primed for memorization during my Sunday School years. I’ve noticed something as I’ve stepped back and examined from a wider angle the various places in Scripture that talk about living the Golden Rule. And I’ve found something. Something important. Something we need to know but don’t really want to acknowledge.

We can love other people until our days are done. We can exhaust ourselves in our efforts to serve others. We can do all the right things as we work for the Lord…and we will still be hated because we are followers of Jesus. We aren’t even guaranteed the love and acceptance of our family as we live wholeheartedly for the Lord.

And the brother shall deliver up the brother to death, and the father the child: and the children shall rise up against their parents, and cause them to be put to death. And ye shall be hated of all men for my name’s sake: but he that endureth to the end shall be saved (Matthew 10:21-22).

 

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UGH… So, what do we do with these people who refuse the grace we extend and cross their arms to the love of Jesus? Well, we love ’em some more.

Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy. But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you (Matthew 5:43-44).

 

This whole “turn the other cheek” thing is just plain unnatural. The fight-or-flight response is to put up your dukes or run the other way. The godly response is to engage the enemy in love and pray earnestly for blessings upon their life.

He tells us that vengeance is His. We know nothing of Him but that He is completely just and that all His ways are right. We don’t have to daily subject ourselves to abuse, but when we encounter it, we are to offer back love in return.

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Maybe this just means holding back a sarcastic comment. Maybe it’s shutting the door quietly instead of slamming it as you calmly remove yourself from the situation. It could be praying blessings upon the man who left you and started another family despite your best efforts at loving and honoring him. Or it might be pleading the blood of Christ over the sins of a lost person whose broken path has wrecked up yours.

Scripture isn’t silent on how we react when the hatred spews in our direction… Please read to the end, friends. I really believe this is crucial to living the Golden Rule and why it is paired right along with it in this passage.

And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise.  For if ye love them which love you, what thank have ye? for sinners also love those that love them. And if ye do good to them which do good to you, what thank have ye? for sinners also do even the same. And if ye lend to them of whom ye hope to receive, what thank have ye? for sinners also lend to sinners, to receive as much again. But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil. Be ye therefore merciful, as your Father also is merciful (Luke 6:27-36).

 

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I’ve written for 31 days on living for the benefit of others and the glory of God. And I could write more. It’s so imperative to the glowing testimony of our marriages, parenting, and daily lives. There are certainly obstacles and reasons it’s just easier to withdraw or walk away.

I don’t know what you’re struggling with or who has hurt you. But I know that if you are here, and you are a true follower of Jesus, you’ll face these moments where you realize how the world sees you. And I know that it will be hard. I must remember He is worthy, and He holds our reward in Heaven. I have to believe that I will see my marriage and my family change and that I will see fruit in my ministry. Even if it doesn’t, I have to know beyond a reasonable doubt that God is good and my obedience is deserved for nothing else than blood spilled years and years ago.

Is there an enemy in your life?
Take time to pray for them today.

Talk to me in the comment section!